Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Fantasy Football Week 7 Awards- NBA Edition

There is a lot to talk about this morning. Not only did the NBA season kick off last night with the Celtics beating the Heat, but the Dallas Cowboy's season has effectively come to an end with Tony Romo's injury. That sound you heard was thousands of people piling off bandwagons.

"The Dallas Cowboys will be the first team to host and play in the Super Bowl!" - Any ESPN Analyst
"The Miami Heat are favorites to win the NBA Championship and the season hasn't begun!" - Vegas Bookies

Let's set something straight before we begin. I am a Miami Heat sympathizer. I am not a Heat fan. I'm a fan of the Washington Wizards. I sympathize with the Heat, however, because I am not a proponent of irrational sports hate. That said, I hate the Dallas Cowboys albeit, rationally. Let me explain.

Unless you lived in Cleveland or grew up a Cavaliers fan and were decimated by The Decision, you are taking your sports hatred way too far. I get it. You're probably bitter LeBron didn't come to your team.

"No way! I would never want that self-involved, egotistical, boob on my team ever!" - Generic reader who hates LeBron.

I'm sure you'd say that if he signed with your team. ("You're darn right I would! Obviously I've made a bold statement that I can't go back on, so I'll commit myself entirely to the stance that LeBron is not even good at basketball. Heck, I think I like Kobe now!" - same generic reader who I am no longer friends with).

There was enough hate going around after The Decision to choke a donkey. LeBron is a sidekick, Jordon would never do that, it's Dwayne Wade's team, LeBron's legacy is ruined, a Baby Ruth is a terrible excuse for a candy bar.

So be it. Let me be the first (or likely, 4,531st) to say that the hate has gone to far. If you watched any of the game last night, and I'm sure you didn't because no one watches regular season NBA, you saw that LeBron took that game over in the second half. Granted, they were down 19 at the time but when Bron turned it on that lead disintegrated to 6 points. He's still the best player in the league overall. The man can dominate, or have a very high success rate, at every position. The hate has gone too far.

That said, the Heat looked awful. Bill Simmons accurately tweeted during the game "Miami looks like they just met 45 minutes ago." It was...um..not good.

Other things to note about that game:
1) The atmosphere was Eastern Conference Finals worthy. Boston Garden was jam packed and the crowd was going nuts. There were more illiterate 18-34 year old males watching this game than there are at Real World house party when the Jersey Shore crew comes over.
2) This was Dwayne Wade's first game with this team, due to him playing only 3 minutes of pre-season before succumbing to a hamstring injury. That affects how you play, it just does. He played terrible yesterday, he looked like cloven-hoofed animal trying to crochet a cardigan.
3) Name the starting center for the Heat. That is a problem.
4) None of the Three Amigos were playing in their usual roles. LeBron and Wade don't know how to co-exist yet, and Bosh looked uncomfortable. He looked like he needed approval from Bron/Wade on everything he did. Did I tie my shoes ok, guys? Should I tuck my jersey in? What are you guys talking about over there!?!!
5) I can go on and on, but you're probably already considering closing this window cause you're tired of the Heat and don't care about the NBA that much.

Here's what I'm saying: the hate on the Heat has gone too far and don't be irrational about how you feel about LeBron. He's a stud no matter what decision he made. If you say he isn't you just don't know anything about sports and I would like to fight you.

On to the Fantasy Football Awards.

The Tony Romo Award- I have Romo on my team and him suffering essentially a season-ending collarbone injury is just what I needed. I can't root for Romo week-to-week. I just can't. I drafted him because I wanted an elite QB who could score a lot of points. Like you, I'm still confused as to why I drafted Romo. If we've learned anything this year its that he is just an above average QB.

You have to face facts. He plays in Dallas, sure, but he's not a star. He's just a good quarterback with good weapons around him. You think Dallas going 1-5 is entirely Wade Phillips fault? Partly, yes. Mostly, probably. However, they're losing games they are in the position to win because they have no leadership on the field. They act entitled and better than they are. There is no reason this team should be 1-5, in fact, more likely they should be 5-1. Romo can't come from behind (quit it), he can't control the offense and, just like my fantasy team, he can't lead them to victory. I'm glad I had a reason to drop him.

The Boston Celtics Award- Just when you think the old guys with fading talents are safe to write off, they surprise you with the play of one young stud. Tom gets this award for absolutely decimating my team this week at the hand of Darren McFadden and his 4 touchdowns. Tom's highest point total going into this week? 91 points. His score against me? 148. I smell a "post motherlovers hangover" coming up.

Sidenote: During the first quarter of the game last night I almost Tweeted, "After the playoffs last year, I'm not really afraid of Ray Allen's jumper anymore." He was 5-8 from beyond the arc. It's good to think before you speak.

The Miami Heat Award- An over-hyped team comes crashing down to reality when they play a good opponent. 6-0 Ricky matched up against Jimmy this week and finally got handed his first loss. Bad luck? I say nay-nay. Ricky finally played a team who put up a reasonable number of points against him and he lost. I hope this is just his luck running out.

In 5 of 7 games, Ricky's opponents have scored less than 81 points. Creasman scored 47 points against him! Ricky's one good win was against Ralph in week 2 when he posted 120 points. I think we'll see the tides begin to turn. That is, if people stop giving him all their best players for cheap.

The Buzz Lightyear Buzz Kill Award- After unabashedly rooting for Jimmy to deliver the final blow to Ricky, Gunst slipped in the comment that it'd be smarter to root against Jimmy (who had the same record as me) so we could fight for a playoff spot. At this point you figure Ricky is a lock for one of the four post-season spots available and Noord, who has the same record, will take one as well. That leaves two spots up for grabs. In a league where most teams are only 1 game apart I should be rooting for the winners to win, and my competition to lose.

Unfortunately, if you know me you know that my pride would never allow me to do that. So go Jimmy!

The Cerberus Slayer Award- I figure the guy with the greatest appreciation of sci-fi should take this award. Congrats Jimmy. Although frightful upon first glance, if you play music this fabled three-headed dog will simply fall asleep allowing safe passage (I learned this from Harry Potter). Similarly, Ricky sucks.


The "It's Time to Consider a New Profession" Award- Eric Creasman has officially fallen below a team named "Sluts R Us" in our fantasy league. *Gulp*


The Showing Signs of Life Award- Neil's team is on a two game win streak, and jumped up the rankings to  5th place. Then again, he'll probably trade his star players away for a case of Natty Light and a high-five.

The "How Did We Get Here?" Award- Noord's team is such a conundrum. His draft was less than impressive yet he's 6-1. I looked at all the match ups (yup, I'm committed to my work) and found that Noord has benefited from playing teams with crucial players on bye weeks (Me and Sam), beat Wheels when Miles Austin and Malcolm Floyd combined for 2.7 points, and came from behind to beat Creasman because Jason Witten finally decided to play football. Other than that, he's beaten Tom and Neil.

I get so bitter so quickly over things that don't matter.

The Battle for the 3 Game Streak- Sam and Austin faced each other last week. Sam on a two game losing streak, Austin a two game win streak. Sam's running backs took a vacation and Donald Driver decided against playing. That's not a recipe for winning.

You know what is? Breaking Tony Romo's collarbone.

Predictions- Some way, some how, Ricky finds a way to beat me this week. Jimmy slays the next giant, Noord which will lead to my excitement, then dismay when I realize there will be only 1 playoff spot left. Ralph extends his win streak to 3. I light myself on fire.

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